- On May 16, 2018
Santa Claus Endorses SwampButt Underwear. On St. Nicholas Day, Santa himself confessed to wearing performance brand SwampButt Underwear™ (www.swampbutt.com) on Christmas Eve to combat his own sweaty backside and rear exposure due to the pants ‘droop’ on his busiest day and evening of the year.
Santa Claus Endorses SwampButt Underwear for Dryness and Security. It’s hot work even on the coldest day and no one wants to see Santa’s butt crack.
SwampButt Underwear™ is for men who sweat a great deal from the belt line down. SwampButt Underwear is made from a blend of spandex and lycra. Spandex provides significant strength and elasticity and the ability to return to the original shape after stretching. And like polyester it wicks moisture and dries quickly. Better still are the variety of colors SwampButt Performance Underwear comes in. These include: white, blue, black, brown, and maroon. Literally a saint, Claus stated that while giving children gifts was his greatest joy, that his was a physically demanding job. Santa Claus Endorses SwampButt Underwear
Hot Inside that Suit No Matter What Santa Claus Endorses SwampButt Underwear
While many parts of the northern hemisphere are cool if not downright cold when Claus makes his rounds, the entire southern hemisphere is enjoying summer on December 24. “I wear the full red suit, boots and hat regardless of the weather or geography, because that is what people expect to see,” Claus said. “But even at its coldest there is a great deal of exertion with transiting the sleigh to the homes and carrying that big sack and don’t get me started about managing those reindeer. So, I work up a good sweat regardless.” Claus continued, “SwampButt Underwear wicks away and helps to dry sweat but it also keeps my backside secure while I am bending over.” Santa Claus Endorses SwampButt Underwear
No One Wants to See Santa’s Butt Crack Santa Claus Endorses SwampButt Underwear
Part of the exertion Claus described comes in the form of bending and stooping while distributing gifts, but there is another hazard Santa has to manage and that is ‘plumbers butt’ while on the job. “In the old days, before electric lights and motion detectors that automatically turn lights on, this was not an issue,” Claus stated. “But in the age of electric lights and now motion controlled lighting, there are lots of opportunities for kids and parents to encounter me and I want to make sure everyone has a positive experience with Santa and that means no southern exposure. So I rely on SwampButt Underwear to keep my buttcrack covered at all times.” Santa Claus Endorses SwampButt Underwear
The triple stitched waist band on every pair of SwampButt Underwear keeps Santa’s and everyone else’s underwear in place while at work, at the gym, or even repairing a sink. “I like to hear laughter, but not because of this,” Claus confessed. “I mean it’s embarrassing to realize that the reason for the giggles is not delight at the gifts I bring, but because of my exposed rear end. No one needs or wants that.”