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Tag: excessive sweating

Scale of Sultry Predicts Two Road Upsets as College Football Heat Threatens Fan Safety

SwampButt Underwear Scale of Sultry for Week three.

The Scale of Sultry is an online tool developed by SwampButt Underwear, a Lake Jackson-based company that makes moisture-managing underwear for men who sweat heavily from the waist down. The Scale combines temperature, relative humidity, sunlight and estimated fabric-drying conditions to produce a score from 1 to 10. Lately, the ‘scale’ correctly predicted that Texas would defeat Ohio State and even more unlikely that Oklahoma State would upend the Oregon Ducks.

SwampButt Underwear Scale of Sultry Picks Texas and Oklahoma State Upsets

SwampButt Underwear Scale of Sultry uses temperature, humidity and solar exposure to determine overall sultriness.

The Scale of Sultry, or SOS, measures temperature, humidity and solar exposure to produce a rating from 1 to 10. A low rating represents relatively comfortable conditions in which perspiration evaporates more readily. A high rating indicates hotter, more humid conditions that can inhibit evaporation and increase physical discomfort.

SwampButt Scale of Sultry Sweats Out a 61% Win Rate

Conditions were especially severe during Texas’ 59–7 victory over Texas State in Austin. The temperature reached 102 degrees, with a reported feels-like temperature of approximately 104 to 105. A widely circulated photograph showed spectators crowded beneath the stadium seeking shade.

A college football prediction model that ignored rankings, betting lines, coaching, injuries and player talent correctly selected 55 of 90 Week 1 winners. The SwampButt Underwear™ Scale of Sultry finished the first full week of the 2026 college football season with a 55–35 record—61% accuracy—after making every selection using one deliberately narrow variable: which team was accustomed to the hotter and more humid home environment.

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